We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
