THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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