He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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