sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Randomize
