He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
