The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
