then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize