A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize