So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
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