Christians are straight up FREAKS
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
