so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
