Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
