ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I have aggressive nipples.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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