Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize