I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
