and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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