is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
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