apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
