i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize