i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
