I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
i need some magic done to my vagina
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
