Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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