We're facebook friends in real life
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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