hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
It was like getting head from an anaconda
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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