She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
