How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
We left an ass print on the piano.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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