we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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