Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
