can we get nightvision for the apartment?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize