Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
This is the high leading the old right now
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize