if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
