is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Acid is not a monday night drug
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
