He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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