I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
