Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize