some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize