At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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