I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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