I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
