My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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