Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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