you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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