Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
