Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
