I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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