C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
