Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
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