SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
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