my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
