i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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